GOD’S COFFEE

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, visited their old university professor. Conversation soon turned on the stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups – porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite – telling them to help themselves to the coffee.



When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said : “ If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. You want to have only the best things for yourselves. That is the source of your problems and stress.


Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups … and then you began eyeing each other’s cups.


Now consider this : Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life, and the type of cup we have neither define, nor change the quality of life we live.


Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God had provided us.”


God brews the coffee, not the cups…… Enjoy your coffee !


“The happiest people don’t have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.”


Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Not to Worry

I used to worry. A lot. The more I fretted, the more proficient I became at it. Anxiety begets anxiety. I even worried that I worried too much! Ulcers might develop. My health could fail. My finances could deplete to pay the hospital bills.

A comedian once said, "I tried to drown my worries with gin, but my worries are equipped with flotation devices." While not a drinker, I certainly could identify! My worries could swim, jump and pole vault! To get some perspective, I visited a well known, Dallas businessman, Fred Smith. Fred mentored such luminaries as motivational whiz Zig Ziglar, business guru Ken Blanchard and leadership expert John Maxwell.

Fred listened as I poured out my concerns and then said, "Vicki, you need to learn to wait to worry."

As the words sank in, I asked Fred if he ever spent time fretting. (I was quite certain he wouldn't admit it if he did. He was pretty full of testosterone-even at age 90.) To my surprise, he confessed that in years gone by he had been a top-notch worrier!

"I decided that I would wait to worry!" he explained. "I decided that I'd wait until I actually had a reason to worry-something that was happening, not just something that might happen-before I worried. "When I'm tempted to get alarmed," he confided, "I tell myself, 'Fred, you've got to wait to worry! Until you know differently, don't worry.' And I don't. Waiting to worry helps me develop the habit of not worrying  and that helps me not be tempted to worry."

Fred possessed a quick mind and a gift for gab. As such, he became a captivating public speaker. "I frequently ask audiences what they were worried about this time last year. I get a lot of laughs," he said, "because most people can't remember. Then I ask if they have a current worry - you see nods from everybody. Then I remind them that the average worrier is 92% inefficient - only 8% of what we worry about ever comes true."

Charles Spurgeon said it best. "Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength."

A TEACHER AND A STUDENT

A teacher teaching Maths to seven-year-old Arnav asked him. “If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?” Within a few seconds Arnav replied confidently, “Four!”

The dismayed teacher was expecting an effortless correct answer (three). She was disappointed. Maybe the child did not listen properly, she thought. She repeated, Arnav, listen carefully. “If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?”

Arnav had seen the disappointment on his teacher’s face. He calculated again on his fingers. But within him he was also searching for the answer that will make the teacher happy. His search for the answer was not for the correct one, but the one that will make his teacher happy. This time hesitatingly he replied, “Four¦”

The disappointment stayed on the teacher’s face. She remembered that Arnav liked strawberries. She thought maybe he doesn’t like apples and that is making him loose focus. This time with an exaggerated excitement and twinkling in her eyes she asked, “If I give you one strawberry and one strawberry and one strawberry, then how many you will have?”

Seeing the teacher happy, young Arnav calculated on his fingers again. There was no pressure on him, but a little on the teacher. She wanted her new approach to succeed. With a hesitating smile young Arnav enquired, “Three?”

The teacher now had a victorious smile. Her approach had succeeded. She wanted to congratulate herself. But one last thing remained. Once again she asked him, “Now if I give you one apple and one apple and one more apple how many will you have?”

Promptly Arnav answered, ”Four!”

The teacher was aghast. “How Arnav, how?”, she demanded in a little stern and irritated voice.
In a voice that was low and hesitating young Arnav replied, “Because I already have one apple in my bag.”

When someone gives you an answer that is different from what you expect don't think they are wrong. There maybe an angle that you have not understood at all. You will have to listen and understand, but never listen with a predetermined notion.

All you need is a positive attitude.

Let me start with this quote " People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be" Abraham Lincoln.

I am convinced that ATTITUDE is everything! It is your choice either to be negative OR positive- it is as simple as that. We all have this power to control our happiness in life because happiness is NOT determined by situations but by attitude. Our attitude about a situation not the actual situation itself, determines whether we view state of affairs as good, bad or ugly.

Let me very candid when I give currency that there is tremendous power in positive attitude. Let us not get into doom or despair in a situation. The formula is to have Faith, Hope, Courage, and Strength. And these components add to the positive attitude. What hinders is the emotion of Fear, Self doubt, Bitterness, and Defeat.

Even if there is lot of temptation to think negative, look it more deeply, you can always find "gains" of positive things in and around your thinking! The best cure for unhappiness is to really start to Count your blessings! Yes, now this will start the reverse gear technique and feelings of frustration and despair will vanish and a positive "thinking:" will start emerging. Now is the time to say "I had the "blues" (note the past tense!) We all have within us, the power to convert any negative thoughts into a positive one with joy and satisfaction.

We have to; transform our thinking set some realistic goals. Here the "Yes I Can" attitude has to be cultivated. ( 24 x 7 ) Let us say that you want to lose 30 kgs just believe that you can do it! May be some of you wants to win a marathon- start dreaming that you have WON it!!! Yes, in the beginning there could be some pain, sweat and endless runs, but that is only in the beginning- but at the end of it, you have reached your mark!!
We all know that "as the day unfolds" it brings its own agenda, however why not get up in the morning with a determination that you are going to have a great day! It is a magic- sure enough you are going to have a productive meaningful efficient day. But if your morning wake up yawn is going to echo " hey! Looks like it is going to be another awful day" mate sure enough you are going to end up the way you have "thought" in a negative way.
This is one of the quotes I always remember when I take a self audit every week! Charles R Swindoll, American philosopher, author, educator, pastor once said, " Attitude keeps me going or cripples my progress. It alone fuels my fire or assaults my hope. When my attitudes are right, there is no barrier too high, no valley too deep, no dream too extreme, and no challenge too great for me"

So dream big!

All you need is a positive attitude.

DEATH - WHAT A WONDERFUL WAY TO EXPLAIN IT

A sick man turned to his doctor, as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, “Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side.” Very quietly, the doctor said, “I don’t know.” “You don’t know? You, a Christian man, do not know what is on the other side?”

The doctor was holding the handle of the door; on the other side came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room and leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.
Turning to the patient, the doctor said, “Did you notice my dog? He’s never been in this room before. He didn’t know what was inside. He knew nothing except that his master was here, and when the door opened, he sprang in without fear. I know little of what is on the other side of death, but I do know one thing… I know my Master is there and that is enough.”

Leader Should Know How to Manage Failure

“ Leader Should Know How to Manage Failure ”

(Former President of India APJ Abdul Kalam at Wharton India Economic Forum, Philadelphia, March 22,2008)

Question: Could you give an example, from your own experience, of how leaders should manage failure?

Kalam: Let me tell you about my experience. In 1973 I became the project director of India's satellite launch vehicle program, commonly called the SLV-3. Our goal was to put India's 'Rohini' satellite into orbit by 1980. I was given funds and human resources -- but was told clearly that by 1980 we had to launch the satellite into space. Thousands of people worked together in scientific and technical teams towards that goal. By 1979 -- I think the month was August -- we thought we were ready. As the project director, I went to the control center for the launch. At four minutes before the satellite launch, the computer began to go through the checklist of items that needed to be checked. One minute later, the computer program put the launch on hold; the display showed that some control components were not in order. My experts -- I had four or five of them with me -- told me not to worry; they had done their calculations and there was enough reserve fuel. So I bypassed the computer, switched to manual mode, and launched the rocket. In the first stage, everything worked fine. In the second stage, a problem developed. Instead of the satellite going into orbit, the whole rocket system plunged into the Bay of Bengal. It was a big failure

That day, the chairman of the Indian Space Research Organization, Prof. Satish Dhawan, had called a press conference. The launch was at 7:00 am, and the press conference -- where journalists from around the world were present -- was at 7:45 am at ISRO's satellite launch range in Sriharikota [in Andhra Pradesh in southern India]. Prof. Dhawan, the leader of the organization, conducted the press conference himself. He took responsibility for the failure -- he said that the team had worked very hard, but that it needed more technological support. He assured the media that in another year, the team would definitely succeed. Now, I was the project director, and it was my failure, but instead, he took responsibility for the failure as chairman of the organization.

The next year, in July 1980, we tried again to launch the satellite -- and this time we succeeded. The whole nation was jubilant. Again, there was a press conference. Prof. Dhawan called me aside and told me, 'You conduct the press conference today.'

Abdul Kalam said, I learned a very important lesson that day. When failure occurred, the leader of the organization owned that failure. When success came, he gave it to his team. The best management lesson I have learned did not come to me from reading a book; it came from that experience.

React Vs. Respond

Suddenly, a cockroach flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. I wondered if this was the cockroach’s response to all the glory that was spoken about it!

She started screaming out of fear. With panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group got cranky to what was happening.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach to another lady in the group. Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.

The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.

In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed and threw it out with his fingers.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behaviour? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized even in my case then , it is not the shouting of my father or my boss that disturbs me, but it’s my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me. It’s not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it’s my reaction to the

problem that hurts me...

The Take-Away

The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

We should not react in life, we should always respond. Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always intellectual....